Hilarious Facts from Crossfit People

If you want want a good laugh, check this out. Post your favorite to comments.

Nate

Even though I was exhausted today, I still attempted Nate. My goal was to get 12 rounds RX'ed. If I got more than that, after the hard week I have had with WOD's and life, I was going to be really pleased. The Workout:

"Nate"

Complete as many rounds in twenty minutes as you can of:
2 Muscle-ups
4 Handstand Push-ups
8 2-Pood Kettlebell swings

Rounds: 14 + 1 MU

For now, that is my PR (even though this is the first time I recorded this WOD).

Post office Paranoia

I went to the post office yesterday to mail my application in to the Allegheny County DA's office, and the clerk asked me how fast I wanted it to get there. Knowing it was not time sensitive, I said, as cheaply as possible. She responded by asking if I wanted to guarantee it. I said, no. She said, kind of snobbishly, "well, then we can't guarantee it will get there." What The F is That All About???? I am mailing it in the same county. Since when do I have to pay to guarantee that my mail is delivered? What happens if I pay for the guarantee? Do they give it to a special mail carrier that never takes his eyes off of it? I bet not. Or, does it mean I get my money back if they lose it, so, in essence, they will try harder not to lose it? If that is the case, who gives a shit, I still have to remail it they lose it. What the hell is up with, "well, then we can't guarantee it will get there." Bull shit, I brought it there, all you have to do is run it 30 minutes into downtown. GET IT THERE!!!!!

Michael

Michael is a surprising tough WOD. I am always surprised how much back extensions mixed with running really wrecks me. Also, there is nothing worse than the pain from a working lower back. Ouch. And it lingers. My abs get sore, my legs get sore, my lats get sore, and after my workout, the pain tends to go away. Not my lower back. And after doing single deadlifts yesterday, I think it was a little fatigued (not that I am pulling with my low back during deadlifts). The Workout:

Michael (Pack Scaling)
Three rounds for time of:
Run 800 meters
35 Back Extensions
35 Sit-ups

Time: 18:46

I debated doing this one as RX'ed, but I am glad I did not. It would have taken me quite a bit longer. I made it through my back ext. and sit-ups with little rest. But, sit-ups just take me forever. I think it is the move. I just can't move it any faster. I try to pull extra hard with my abs, engage the arm swing, and it is still slow. Maybe I need to try a leg anchor.

Anyway, topping off the week with Nate tomorrow morning. I am excited for the MU. Hopefully, my hands stop hurting from Tommy V.

Single Deadlifts

It was another day of single deadlifts today. This is one WOD that I always use to evaluate my progress with Crossfit. Before coming to the light, I struggled to deadlift 185lbs. ten time. However, a year later, my weight has skyrocketed in my opinion. I need to concentrate on pulling more with my hams and not at all with my back, but as my weight increases, I become more confident in my form. My last PR, in September, was 335. The Workout:

Deadlift:
1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1

weight: 305, 315, 320, 325, 330, 335, 340 (PR)

I struggled with 330 and 335, and felt my form starting to suffer. I chalked it up to Tommy V yesterday and the lunges on Monday. However, I stepped up to the bar at 340, took a deep breath, and pulled with everything. Feels good to PR.

Tommy V

I was actually a little afraid of this WOD the first time I saw it. I immediately thought, "the sub for rope climb is 15 towel pullups. If the WOD starts with 12 ascents, that is a hell of a lot of towel pullups. However, thanks to the brand x forum, it looks like a sufficient sub was 5 towel pull ups with 5 knee to elbows (if you would use your legs during the rope climbs). I obviously do not have a rope at my globo, and I have only ascended a rope once with no legs. Banking on those two factors, I decided the 5 and 5 would be a good sub. However, I did not take a towel to the gym, so I decided that neutral grip pull ups with a neutral grip lat pull down triangle draped over the pull up bar would be sufficient. So, the Workout:

Tommy V: Porch Scaling
For time:
115 pound Thruster, 15 reps
15 ft Rope Climb, 9 ascents (or 5 neutral grip pullups/5 kte's)
115 pound Thruster, 12 reps
15 ft Rope Climb, 6 ascents
115 pound Thruster, 9 reps
15 ft Rope Climb, 3 ascents

Time: 17:15

The time felt really slow. The pull ups took me forever as I kept dropping from the neutral grip to reposition to do the kte's. But, that time does not seem to far off, so I will take it. Nothing like over coming a fear.

Haunted House

So, I went to the Scarehouse here in Pittsburgh last Friday. I was a little nervous as we drove to it because I am a little scared of the unknown (which translates to dark places) and the haunted house is supposedly ranked by the Travel Channel as the third best in the US. However, it was quite a let down. It appeared to take place in one giant room and they divided it up with all these turns and bends. It lasted about 20 minutes, and after about the third person "popping" out of no where, it was pretty predictable.

I guess it is back to watching those Ghost Hunter shows to get my adrenaline up a little before walking around my dark house and scaring myself. What a waste of money.

Walking Lunges/Sit-ups

After the weekend off, I got back to the WOD's today. I woke up this morning feeling a little sluggish after a rough night's sleep, but I got going and made the most of the workout this afternoon. I was not super excited about the lunges/sit-ups. After a weekend of rest, I prefer a high cardio metcon. But, that should come tomorrow with Tyler. The Workout:

Four rounds for time of:
Walking lunge 50 meters
Sit-ups, 50 reps

Time: 11:06

Looking at the Brand X anything sub 12 min is a good time, so I am feeling pretty good about it. I need to work on my sit-ups. While my feet were free, I used some serious arm swinging as I got higher in the reps. I need to build up my core strength so I can keep my hands at my sides, and I need to work at my stamina so I can squeeze out 50 + without too much rest.

Tabata Something Else

I really do not like this WOD. Something about the constant exhaustion, mixed with what seems to be a never ending stopwatch, makes this one painful. I had a worker at my Globo time me during my pull-ups. About halfway through my reps started to drop off and he said, "that looks like it is getting hard." No Shit!!! The Workout:

"Tabata Something Else"

Complete 32 intervals of 20 seconds of work followed by ten seconds of rest where the first 8 intervals are pull-ups, the second 8 are push-ups, the third 8 intervals are sit-ups, and finally, the last 8 intervals are squats. There is no rest between exercises.

Rep Score: 8, 10, 10, 15 (respectively)

It was not my best showing, but I was exhausted this morning, so I will take it.

Heading off to the Scarehouse tonight here in Pittsburgh. It is rated in the top three in the US. Should be interesting. Bring on the adrenaline.

Single Pull-ups

I was excited to do single pull-ups last night. The last time I did this WOD was the first time, and it took me forever to find my single PR weight. I finally found it at 90 lbs while weighing 171 lbs. So, I was excited last night to see how much I had progressed in the month in a half. The Workout:

Weighted pull-ups 1-1-1-1-1-1-1 reps

Weight: 75, 85, 90, 90, 92.5, 95, 95, 97.5 (maybe)

I went ahead and attempted 97.5 just to get to failure. My chin got really close to getting above the bar, but I don't know if it got over or not.

Just another reason to Crossfit

If you have not seen this movie, I recommend it highly.

Tyler

When I saw this WOD, I got all excited because I love doing Muscle Ups, even if they are on a bar instead of rings. Partly because I told myself I would scale every work for this month to see what happens, and partly because I thought I would never get through Tyler as RX'ed, I scaled to the second of three suggested Porch scaling. The workout:

Tyler:
Five rounds for time of:
4 Muscle-ups
65 pound Sumo-deadlift high-pull, 21 reps

Time: 7:57

Looking at my time, I think I could have done 95 lb SDHP or 7 MU. Comparing to others on the Brand X forum, that looks like a really fast time. I will be sure to do it as RX'ed next time.

Still watching Ghost shows, and still have yet to see any solid evidence of paranormal activity. They are at an Irish Castle right now. Surely there would be some activity here if it existed.

Hip-back Extension/Run

Was not quite sure what to do with this WOD. I thought I was pretty strong with my back extensions, saw a video for hip-back extensions, and went for it RX'ed. It started off pretty well, but my back started to get weak really quickly, and I really felt it during my runs. The weird part of the WOD was where I was feeling the fatigue in my legs while running. My legs were getting odd crampy feelings in my quads and around my IT bands. Not what I expected. Anyway, the workout:

For time:
21 Hip-Back Extensions
Run 400 meters
18 Hip-Back Extensions
Run 400 meters
15 Hip-Back Extensions
Run 400 meters
12 Hip-Back Extensions
Run 400 meters
9 Hip-Back Extensions
Run 400 meters
6 Hip-Back Extensions
Run 400 meters
3 Hip-Back Extensions
Run 400 meters

Time: 17:51

I hope my back does not feel like one giant tight knot tomorrow. I have to go to court with my boss all day with the hope of learning the ropes a little.

Ghosts

I have developed this odd attraction to horror movies and ghost shows this Halloween season. I don't know if I am gaining a new interest in my life, or if I have developed an adrenaline addiction thanks to Crossfitting. Along with this new attraction comes watching hours of those Ghost shows when I have time to watch TV at night and on the weekends. You know the ones I am talking about, Paranormal State, Ghost Hunters, Ghost Adventure, etc. However, I am not convinced at the existence of the paranormal. The most the tv shows offer are quick videos of supposed shadows, sounds that sound like wind, or their personal experiences. All of this is debunked by the psychological theory of Confirmation Bias. So, I have developed two questions.

1. If the different places are so haunted, and people experience the haunting all the time, why don't those people carry video recorders with them to get solid evidence?

2. If ghosts are real, and they are haunting shit, why do they hide? If I were a ghost, and someone was trying to provoke me, I would do everything I could to scare the piss out of them. Why would I hide in the shadows and bore myself by closing doors or rocking a chair?

The problem is, all "evidence" comes from someone's perceptions and no one can verify that kind of evidence. That shit would never hold up in a courtroom. Well, actually, some dumbass judge would allow it. For now, I continue my belief that ghosts are not real. Go ahead, prove me wrong.

Hang Squat Clean, Push-ups

Something did not seem right today during my WOD. I don't know if it was because of my bad diet over the weekend, still recovering from wrecking my legs last week, the difficulty of hang squat cleans, or a combination of all three, but I felt sluggish. I headed to the gym with the intent of doing a Porch scaling of 115lb x 15 reps per round, but when I got there, I had to modify. The Workout:

Five rounds for time of:
115 pound Hang squat clean, 10 reps
30 Push-ups

time: 13:32

Comparing this time to the Brand X forum, it looks like I chose a good modified scale. All I can say is that this one sucked.

Keep your fingers crossed that my boss offers me a full time job this week. Now that I am licensed, I am feeling the pressure for a full time job more than ever.

Esq

After my WOD on Friday, I headed downtown to file my official application to be admitted to the PA bar with the Supreme Court Office of the Prothonotary. I thought it would take a few weeks for them to send me my official license, but, sure enough, the lady at the desk handed me a piece of paper with my PA Bar #. So, this is it, after 4 years of undergrad, 3 years of law school, a summer of studying my ass off, and a shit ton of money, i am an Esquire.

Elizabeth

Friday was Elizabeth day. I was afraid that my time would suck because my legs were ready to fall off after Fran the day before. I was not too concerned about my forearms, even though I had a hard time making a fist right after Fran. My last time on Elizabeth was 8:38. The workout:

Elizabeth -
21-15-9 reps of:
Clean 135 pounds
Ring dips (I did 2x paralette (sp?) because i don't have rings)

Time: 7:19 as RX'ed

I am not sure what my goal time should be for this WOD, but I will take ~1:20 faster.

Fran

Once again, I am slacking on my posts. I am going to go back to Thursday, Oct. 15 to post my time for Fran.

The workout:

Three rounds, 21-15- and 9 reps, for time of:
95 pound Thruster
Pull-ups

Time: ~6:30 as RX'ed

I don't remember my exact time, and I do not have my log book in front of me as I am out of town for the weekend. My goal is based on GD's time suggestions posted on the Brand X forum of 5:00 or faster. I made sure I stayed true to form while doing my thrusters. I hate thrusters.

5K

As for today, I ran the 5K. Usually I use the 5K WODs as active rest days because I really dislike running long distances. Something about a continued state of exhaustion from running just makes the time spent running miserable. It was freezing outside when I got up, so I headed back to the globo gym to run on the treadmill. I know, it is not the same as running on pavement . . .

5K:

Time: 21:43

That is a pretty good time for me. I have ran 5K's faster in actual races, but can never quite replicate that time on a treadmill. I started at a 7.5 speed, then 8.5, 9.0, 9.5, and 10.0.

My GF was approached for the first time at her college gym today by a guy asking her if she is the girl who does Crossfit. Such a proud moment.

Row, SDHP, Pull-ups

I apologize for being a day late with this WOD post, but yesterday was super busy. I did not make it to the Globo Gym until 730 last night and was there until 830. By the time I ran some errands and got home for a shower and snack, it was almost 10.

Anyway, my WOD from yesterday:

Complete as many rounds in 20 minutes as you can of:
Row 250 meters
Sumo deadlift highpull 95 pounds, 21 reps (scaled to 65 pounds)
Pull-ups 15 reps

Rounds: 4 rnds + SDHP + 2 pull-ups

I had to improvise a little on the rowing because my gym's rower is on the opposite side of the running track from the weight room. So, I ran to the rower, rowed 175 m, then ran back to the weight room. I assume it was about 250m in total. The Wod was pretty brutal and I was worn out by the time I lied down for sleep.

On the flip side, my knees felt great today. The hurt a little after Monday's Thrusters because I had to run to the gym in the cold and run home in the cold. They felt ok yesterday, but this morning, they were back to normal.

Thrusters

Well, back for another week at my Globo Gym. I had a fantastic weekend with my gf, but we had to spend it at a wedding. We left on Friday to see some different places in VA, then headed down to the wedding spot on Saturday afternoon. I managed to piss off my friends because my gf and I needed to rest after a hard week of wods and know that drinking is not really Zone Approved. I took a lot of crap for not staying out and "partying." I also realized that my gf and I are the most unromantic people we know. We hate weddings and decided the only benefits were the food and dancing. All-in-all, I will be sure to spend over $250 doing something we want to do next time.

On to the Wod. I did:

Thrusters:
1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1

Weight: 180, 180, 185, 185, 190, 190(f), 195(f), 190(f)

I PR'ed last time at 190lbs, so I wanted to try 195 even though I failed at 190. Imagine that, I failed again. It is the first time I failed at progress when repeating a wod. I am chalking it up to my hatred for thrusters and my recent dedication to making sure I am keeping true to form.

Off to work tomorrow, wish me luck that something interesting happens. Did I mention that I passed that bar???? Hell yeah!!!!

Power Clean, Sit-ups, Back Extensions

After my excitement over the bar exam, and finishing my day at work, I headed off to the gym for my daily WOD. I decided to do the Pack scaling because I am a little sore from the cluster f of lifts yesterday, and I wanted to save some energy for my first 30 muscle up WOD tomorrow morning. Anyway:

18-15-12-9-6 and 3 rep rounds of:
Power clean 95 pounds
Sit-ups
Back extensions

Time: 10:26

Until tomorrow, I have done pull-ups and dips every 30 MU WOD day. I discovered that I could do MU's about a month ago, and I have been waiting for this WOD to come up again. Wish me luck, we will see if I can make it through all of them.

After that, I am off to VA for the weekend for a wedding. I hate weddings, should be interesting. At least I have the glory of passing the bar to carry me through.

PA Bar Exam

While I do not yet have a WOD post for the day, I am happy to report that I passed the PA bar exam. Hell yeah!!! I was getting a little nervous there for a while, but I kept a positive, confident outlook, and it all paid off. Now, if only I can find a job in criminal law that I like.

What Xfit lift or move do you hate the most?

I wanted to start his poll to see what I get back. What do you absolutely hate to see come up in a WOD? For me, it was thrusters, but now . . . snatches. Post to comments.

Awful Chipper WOD

Today was the "lots of stuff" WOD posted last week. I had to sub 3 x parallel dips, Thrusters, and did 45 pullups for three rope climbs. I attempted to take a towel to do towel pull ups, but when I practiced them, I slid right off of the towel. Last time I visited an affiliate, I did a rope climb after the WOD and had no trouble getting up with no legs. Anyway:

For time:
25 Walking lunge steps
20 Pull-ups
50 Box jumps, 20 inch box
20 Double-unders
25 Ring dips
20 Knees to elbows
30 Kettlebell swings, 2 pood
30 Sit-ups
20 Hang squat cleans, 35 pound dumbells
25 Back extensions
30 Wall ball shots, 20 pound ball
3 Rope climb ascents

Time: 19:25.

I also bought some adidas sambas today to try. I read at the brand x forum last night that flat shoes with little cushy support is better for oly lifts. I never realized my running shoes were so awful for xfitting. They worked well today.

I also had a good zone meal tonight, except for the papaya, which is a disfavored carb. Oh well, still better than what most Americans had for dinner tonight.

The Ultimate Fighter is on at 10 p.m. Let's see if Kimbo comes back. I hope he does, I hate Big Country, and I probably would have killed myself if I lost to him. Fat Ass!!!

another hilarious pic

Not that I am trying to ride the humor of Shotty's blog, but here is another hilarious pic that I wanted to share.

Single Snatches

After work tonight, I did not the Seven Single Snatch Wod. I hate snatches. The first time I did this Wod back in the spring, I did horribly because I did not know anything about proper form. Tonight, I PR'ed at 145 lbs. That is, I worked my way up to 145 lbs and then stayed there because I was not doing a full squat and not locking out at the right time. I even had to drop down to 135 during my last rep just to make sure my form was a little better. Oh well, I have something to work on during skill days after I get down my muscle ups and butterfly kips.

I sat around at work today and typed a brief for an appeal to an Administrative Law Judge. The client was a nurse caught stealing drugs from the Hospital's Pharmacy. The federal government has excluded her from working anywhere that accepts federal, state, or local government funding. So, she can work no where and we are stuck attempting to convince some ALJ that does not give a shit that this poor, now clean, mother of an autistic child needs to work. Sure, she should not have been taking drugs from the start, but too late now. Anyone got any ideas?

So, what is your least favorite crossfit technique? Mine was thrusters, I think it moved to snatches. I officially hate them.

FYI, don't eat a prickly pear unless you know what you are getting into. Taste fruit, but the seeds are hard and make it tough to eat.

Awesome Pic

Found this on Shotty's xfit blog and wanted to share it.

Helen and Michael Moore

OK, so the parts to the title of this blog have nothing to do with each other. I did Helen this morning. When I started to warm up this morning, I realized I did not write down the reps of KB swings for each round. So, I asked a director at my globo gym to use her internet. She had not idea what crossfit is. I was not surprised, but a little insulted when she told me that I should join their computer fitness program because then I could sign in and do the daily workout they suggest. I can only imagine what that would involve, especially because most people I know who use that program use machines. Machines are the enemy!!!

Three rounds for time:
Run 400 meters
1 1/2 pood Kettlebell X 21 swings (or 55 pound dumbbell swing)
12 Pull-ups

Time: 10:09 as RX'ed

For anyone who reads the Brand X Forum, that is only 9 seconds above GuardDawg's suggested time for that WOD.

This afternoon I saw Capitalism, A Love Story. It was my first Michael Moore movie, and I must say that I rather enjoyed it. If anyone has done a fact check on it, let me know. I have been following the economic crisis on and off for the last two years, but I had not idea how corrupt the Government's role is in the matter. Paulson should be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law and sent to a federal "fuck me in the ass" prison. Except, once he had the bank regulations thrown out the window during the Bush Administration, I guess what he did was technically not illegal. I am sure some smart prosecutor could find something illegal he did. Maybe mail fraud. Bottom line, Obama better not allow the big companies to influence his presidency. Otherwise, he is nothing more than an f'ing idiot and I hope he gets impeached.

Scrubs is on. Hell yeah. Although I do not like this episode because Karla is obsessed with being a mother and is letting her marriage fall. Just another reason to never have one.

Later!!!

Rest Day

Took another rest day today. It was much needed after a tough week and the WOD from yesterday. I am pretty sore from pistols. I officially hate them.

I was 1/2 active today, if you can say that. I went over to the barn this morning to hang out with the local hunter pace. I had a little port, a cookie, and shot the bull with some local yuppies. I still don't understand the concept of the Hunt. I can see the sport of riding horses with hounds looking for actual foxes. However, with the no kill hunts, someone sets the catch, and people just get all dressed up to ride around for hours looking for a preset ending. Kind of takes the mystery out of it. Also, members pay like $2000 a year just to ride around like this. I can go out on a horse and ride around all day for free. Maybe I don't love horses enough, who knows.

Then I watched Rugby on Spike. Wow, do I love Rugby. I fell in love with the sport when I was in London a few years ago. I hate the sports stations in this country for not showing rugby. Maybe some day. For now, I am stuck watching boring American Football just waiting for the day when Rugby makes it debut and Americans learn when real sports are.

Other than that, I watched bad horror movies on Syfy this afternoon, did some things around the house, and made dinner. Now, it's steeler time . . . if only it were rugby time again. Oh well, dumb country.

Run/Pistols/Situps

I decided to do the posted WOD for today even though I am usually a few days behind because my GF was in for the weekend and we could do it here at the house.

Pack Run, Pistols, and Sit-ups. I did as many free standing pistols as I could before using a pole to help myself out of the bottom of the squat.
Run 800m
15 left then right-leg - 8 free standing/ 7 assisted
25 sit-ups
12 left then right-leg - 5 free standing/7 assisted
25 sit-ups
9 left then right-leg - 3 free standing/6 assisted
Run 800m

Time: 16:27

I hate pistols because they make my knees feel funny. I would love to see someone do this WOD rx'ed. those would be some strong ass quads.

Nice day here in Pittsburgh for the first time in a week. I think I will go horseback riding this afternoon.

Rest Day . . . check out this video.

I found this on the Mainsite. Anyone who reads the daily articles or watches all of the video previews has seen this before, but I wanted to post it anyway. It explains a hypothesis that the war in the Middle East is not a war against a particular religion, but one against tribalism. Check it out: Watch video

I took a rest day today. I was supposed to finish the week with single snatches. However, after the late football game last night, I decided to skip the snatches, take a rest day, run a 5K tomorrow, and rest again until Monday. The more the day goes on, the more thankful I am that I took the day off, I feel exhausted.

My Zoning went to shit last night. Too much beer, tailgating, and stadium food. The more I zone, the more I think I am becoming a hermit. It is a scary word outside these walls when it comes to food. Oh well, give it a day or two, and my hormones will be back in order.

One last note, I can't figure out how to add my favorite links to the side of my blog page. Anyone help? (Edit: Never mind, as you will see, I figured it out)

Oh, the Globo Gym. This morning there were house wives warming up for aerobics by doing exercise ball crunches in one corner, an older lady with the exercise ball between her legs working her lower abs in the other corner while talking on her cell phone, and the aerobics instructor was running on the treadmill while holding on to the front and extending too far with her forward foot. Sometimes I just don't know whether to correct them or just walk by smiling.

Anyway, I was pretty strong this morning considering it had only been 12 hours since I did Angie. WOD for today:

Complete as many rounds as possible 20 minutes of:
95 pound Thruster, 5 reps
95 pound Hang Powercleans, 7 reps
95 pound Sumo Deadlift High-pull, 10 reps

I did 8 rounds back in August. Today, rx'ed, I did 9 rounds, thrusters and Hang Power Cleans. Not as much improvement as my Angie time, but I will take it.

Well, I am off to WVU today for the game tonight. Going to throw my Zoning out the window for the night and tailgate with a few beers. Should be a good game, watch it on ESPN 2.